Did someone say, “Gee, that 31 Questions is okay for a community TV show. But they could really use a once off $350 joke”?
No? Well, I’m not surprised… But for argument’s sake, let’s assume you did!
Last Thursday May 10 was our penultimate studio shoot and my good friend of 18 odd years, Gerard Kotlowy (also one of the 31 Questions writers) booked himself a flight from Adelaide to Melbourne to see his vision to appear on television and then be transformed into a cardboard cutout of himself come true.
The only problem was… the cardboard cutout only arrived today.
So we shot Gerard’s “live” bit last week and hopefully the magic of television will allow the 2nd half of our single most expensive gag to be immortalised on fabulous standard definition video tape during our final day in the studio tomorrow evening!
The rest of the taping was a bit more rocky than in previous weeks. This was thanks mainly to competition with the news programme “Newsline” over RMITV resources such as the autocues, graphics machine and other things I don’t understand.
Newsline goes live to air from 5.45PM to 6PM in the adjacent Studio B. So we had to keep it down during a time where we would otherwise be rehearsing and setting up for our shows.
I’m all too familiar with Newsline, having completed a Graduate Diploma of Journalism (with Distinction, might I add) from RMIT University two years ago. A great course. I learned a lot and especially loved the television component.
If memory serves, back then Newsline was 45 minutes. But these days it seems to only be 15 minutes. It might have something to do with my infamous gaff on the show back in ’10…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZSojtnWJIf8
Man, that was some bizarre television… Exactly what community TV should be 🙂
Speaking of which, back to our show!
Ahh Anthony, will you ever change that shirt? Or even just wash it once in a while, for Christ’s sake…
We had a huge audience last week. And by “huge”, I mean like, 15 or so? Many thanks to the good folk who came down and joined in the triviality of the evening.
It’s all getting to be a bit of a blur now. We’ve done 11 of these shows. I’ve forgotten 90% of the crap I’ve said. And as yet, I haven’t even watched any of the footage back.
That’s not really how I’d like to do things in a perfect world, as I do find I’m able to self evaluate my performance much more effectively when I can see the video. I improve my sex life in much the same way.
So this brings us to the FINAL studio shoot. We’re taping the last two episodes of our 13-episode season Thursday, 17 May 2012.
We’ve got a lot to get done. As well as Eps 12 and 13, we also have to shoot four sketches and a bunch of pick-up shots; little things we missed or forgot to do in previous weeks.
So come join the fun. It’s most likely your LAST EVER OPPORTUNITY to see me host a TV show. I mean, what moron would let me loose in a TV studio again? Someone who wanted to get fired.
Hell, 31 Questions was officially cancelled by management in February last year! People have been trying to stop this show since the beginning.
So this is it, my friends and foes. It’s now or never.
So what are you waiting for!?!
Be an extra special member of our exclusive studio audience. 7PM RMIT University. Studio A, Level 2, Building 12, near the corner of Swanston and Franklin Streets, Melbourne. Join the Facebook event here. Come one, come all!
And feel free to join us cast and crew for a few drinks afterwards at an as yet undecided location.
And a very big thank you to TV’s Andrew O’Keefe and the good people at Profile Talent Management and Global Television Studios in South Melbourne!
The irony is we actually shot a sketch where AO’K refuses to appear in an ID for 31 Questions…
Stay tuned for that one. It will be an opening sketch to one of our 13 episodes and will debut on Channel 31 at some point between June and August. More info when we find out our timeslot.
We’ve now passed the half way point in the 31 Questions shooting schedule!
Last Thursday May 3, we shot episodes 8 and 9. Once again there were the usual issues to deal with: crew calling in sick, technical glitches, pressed for time, etc.
But we had a great audience turnout this week and we managed to shoot a couple of quick sketches in addition to the two episodes. Plus we finished on time for a change. Incredible!
And it’s still smiles all round. At least when Simon gets his camera out.
Some of the gags were a bit hit and miss. It never ceases to surprise me how completely off the mark I can be re how I think an audience will react.
My hilarious friend Gerard Kotlowy and I, in one of our many laugh-generation sessions whenever I’m back in Adelaide, came up with this gag involving me pulling a cob of corn from beneath my podium in response to a question about farmers.
I thought it would kill!
On the night it received a lukewarm response. In hindsight it probably just confused people.
But on the other hand, a throw away line coming back from a break: “I’m David M. Green. The love child of Jim Carrey, Gary Numan, and Jim Carrey…” got a HUGE laugh.
Pfft… comedy.
I think that’s why I like it so much. It’s never without mystery.
An amusing bi-product of producing this TV show is I seem to be amassing an assortment of bizarre random items.
The other day I had to go buy a rubber duck and a packet of little army men… watch the show and eventually you’ll find out why.
When this is all over, I’ll have in my possession: x4 A1 sized black and white posters of my face, x10 David M. Green mugs, an air horn, x2 fluoro orange workers’ shirts, a name plate that says “Moderator”, x3 overpriced 31 Questions custom microphone flags, a safety card from a Boeing 737-800, and these are just the things we haven’t already given away as prizes…
If there’s one thing I’ve already got enough of… it’s desk ornaments…
Television has a rich history of amassing interesting knickknacks. A fact explored further by Anthony McCormack and myself in this brief video recorded in the RMITV prop room…
This Thursday May 10 is our penultimate 31 Questions studio shoot. So if you can’t make it for the finale on May 17 THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE!
So come watch two shows as they’re recorded on fabulous standard definition video tape this Thursday 7PM, Studio A, Level 2, Building 12 of RMIT University on scenic Swanston Street, Melbourne.
RSVP to the event on Facebook. Or don’t and come anyway. Or alternatively, RSVP on Facebook and then don’t come. Or don’t RSVP and don’t come. These are your four options.
Surprise me.
Kind regards,
David M. Green
Oooooh… 31 Questions is coming sooooooooon!
A few weeks ago I received this email out of the blue:
Date: Tue, 18 Oct 2011 15:15:47 +0100
From: Marcus Taylor
Hey David,
Hope you’re having a great start to the week 🙂
I just wanted to get in touch as I came across your Youtube channel and really enjoyed your review of How to Win Friends & Influence People – great book!
I’m currently looking for some awesome video bloggers like yourself to review a book coming out this Thursday called Get Noticed, which is described as being ‘a how to guide to being in the right place at the right time, all the time’ and has been dubbed as a ‘must-read’ by New York Times best selling author Debra Fine.
You would be one of the first people to review this book, so there’s a great exposure opportunity in place. As a little added benefit we’d also be offering you:
£4.20 (roughly $7.50) commission for any sales you refer from your video review.
Exposure on the Get Noticed website
Promotion of your video from the author’s Twitter & Facebook accounts
A free e-copy of the book to read
Invitation to an exclusive UStream interview with the authors (you also have the opportunity to interview the authors with any questions you have)
Hopefully together we can promote your video and channel to get some benefit from the buzz around the book launch.
If it sounds of interest I can send through a copy of the book and we can go from there!
Thanks,
Marcus
Now, I get spam like this all the time. So naturally, I did a little research. This guy seemed legit. He’s some author from the UK who’s written what I could only assume was some kind of self-help book.
But what the hell was he contacting me for?
When did I ever review “How to win friends and influence people”?
Oh wait… surely he doesn’t mean THIS…
Ah yes, last year my good friend Lachlan Cowlishaw and I, for a bit of fun, set up a couple of cameras and chairs in Lachlan’s garage and goofed around for a few hours.
We just used things lying around his garage as props. One of them happened to be a copy of the original 1936 self-help book “How to win friends and influence people” by Dale Carnegie. And in the midst of ab-libbing, we made a few references to it.
Okay, so this Marcus guy is familiar with my sarcastic brand of comic japery. And the temptation of a quick buck is a boon for the spam email industry… so I figured I had nothing to lose by asking a few more questions:
Date: Wed, 19 Oct 2011 17:06:34 +1100
From: David M. Green
Hi Marcus,
Thanks for your email. Sounds interesting.
What kind of deadline are you wanting?
DMG
—
Date: Fri, 21 Oct 2011 18:17:22 +0100
From: Marcus Taylor
Hi David,
Thanks for getting in touch, there’s no deadline per se but the sooner the better as there will be a lot of buzz about the book during the launch this week. I’ve attached a copy for you to have a look at and base your review on. If there’s anything extra that would help you just let me know and i’ll see what I can do 🙂
Cheers,
Marcus
So I took a look at the book. My first reaction was “100 pages!?! This is like an entire book! I don’t have time to read this!”
For the first time in my life, I’m working full time (6 day weeks for a while there) and really don’t have time to do anything.
At the same time I welcomed the opportunity to make another funny video; I don’t seem to make enough of them these days…
I figured this Marcus guy was a savvy character. He’s written a book. He wants to promote it. Surely, he’s sent out dozens of these emails to YouTube people, right?
So I did a browse, but couldn’t find anyone else who had uploaded a review.
I did find one though from the authors themselves:
I also saw THIS, which is just too good to be true…
Note the upload date and number of views for his video “How to Get Noticed on YouTube”:
Okay. So a guy who ironically has a video on YouTube about how to get views on YouTube, that’s had 6 views in 4 months, wants to give me a $7.50 commission for every book I sell for him.
Now, I’m no whiz with these money-making schemes. I sure as hell don’t make any money from this website. How exactly would this work?
I inquired.
Date: Sat, 22 Oct 2011 23:12:13 +1100
From: David M. Green
Cheers Marcus,
I’ll take a look at that.
Just out of interest, how will you track the number of sales I attract?
DMG
—
Date: Sat, 22 Oct 2011 13:20:48 +0100
From: Marcus Taylor
No problem, the sales are tracked with an affiliate tracking code that’s unique to you. So we’ll give you a unique link to the site, which if sales are referred from we’ll know that you referred the sale.
Marcus
—
Date: Sun, 23 Oct 2011 00:48:38 +1100
From: David M. Green
Ok sounds good. And you’d just want me to upload the video to my own YouTube account?
DMG
—
Date: Sat, 22 Oct 2011 17:11:36 +0100
From: Marcus Taylor
yep! 🙂
So long story short, my good friend Anthony McCormack came round and helped me make THIS:
Hold on to your hats folks, because what I’m about to say may shock you…
I don’t think Marcus likes it.
You may have noticed (but you probably didn’t, no offense), there’s no link anywhere in the video or its description for you to go and purchase a copy of “Get Noticed”.
The saga continues…
Date: Sat, 29 Oct 2011 18:38:36 +1100
From: David M. Green
Hi Marcus,
I’ve “reviewed” your book.
If you’d be so kind as to send over that unique tracking code link, I’ll put it in the video description.
Kind regards,
TV’s David M. Green
—
Date: Sun, 30 Oct 2011 14:31:55 +0000
From: Marcus Taylor
Hi David,
I appreciate you taking the time to do this, however I’d like to raise a few points.
The video I was referencing in my e-mail was this one:
which although not a ‘review’ per se, I found quite funny.
Also, Get Noticed is not a ‘self help’ book as such, it’s aimed towards creative people & entrepreneurs and is about getting noticed to become more successful at what you do. I did show the video to a few friends who have read the book and they were very confused by the claims you were making.
No hard feelings, but i’d like to ask you kindly if you can remove the video if you wouldn’t mind. I don’t feel it positively serves what either of us are trying to do and I was under the impression from your emails that you were genuinely interested in reading it – I’ve always felt that making personal attacks & uninformed negative reviews publicly is not productive and after all, what goes around tends to come around.
With that in mind, i’d appreciate it if you could remove the video, but if you feel strongly about leaving it live we can discuss further, as I really don’t want to create negativity online about each other’s work as i’m sure we’ve both got much better things to get on with.
Many thanks,
Marcus Taylor
Co-author of Get Noticed
“Uninformed negative reviews”?
Now personally, the idea that there’s a group of people on the other side of the world “very confused” by my video, I find hilarious.
What I found confusing was how he could set “The All New Garage Show” as the benchmark for a good, wholesome and funny book review (I could just end that sentence there, but there’s more), AND THEN be surprised at the video I produced for HIS book?
Date: Mon, 31 Oct 2011 16:54:15 +1100
From: David M. Green
Hi Marcus,
So, you are aware that I’m a comedian. What exactly were you expecting?
DMG
Hehehe… this just gets better and better…
Date: Mon, 31 Oct 2011 13:46:16 +0000
From: Marcus Taylor
Hi David,
Honestly, I was expecting a genuine review of the book with a touch of humour but in a way that you’d be able to maybe share some of the tips from the book, opposed to humouring the book & myself directly. I wasn’t entirely sure how you’d go about it, but I figured you’d do it in a way slightly differently to most video bloggers, which is kind of what i’m after.
I am going to be living in Melbourne for six months next year, which I notice is where you’re based, so I’ll try and come along to a show if you’ve got anything lined up then as I do enjoy your comedy (obviously excluding the review…) and we’re also looking to do some cool stuff promoting the talents of creative & artistic individuals so i’d be keen to see you do some stand-up.
Is there any possibility that you could remove the video?
Thanks,
Marcus
Hmmm… puts me in a predicament doesn’t it?
Do I take it down in exchange for some “promotion” or do I leave it up and get the “promotion” I was originally promised, like they gave to Mattias Gronborg from Stockholm, who I can only assume “passed” the Get Noticed review challenge:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fW2A1xBdijk
I never seem to learn my own lesson: DON’T WRITE REVIEWS!
The last review I wrote got me kicked off a TV show.
But you know what? This time I’m standing up for free speech.
Date: Tue, 01 Nov 2011 22:02:43 +1100
From: David M. Green
Hi Marcus,
Thank you for the compliments.
I must say though, I find this whole thing fascinating.
You have actually watched that video, yes?
You do realise that in that “review”, Lachlan (Kevin) reveals he hadn’t actually read “How to win friends and influence people”? (This is stated multiple times throughout the video)
So I have not at all misrepresented myself. I have not tricked you into thinking I do serious book reviews. My review of “Get Noticed” was in a similar style.
You say you figured I’d do my review “in a way slightly different to most video bloggers”. I believe I’ve done exactly that.
When you asked me to review your book, you didn’t set any guidelines. You did not say “don’t call it a self-help book”. I apologise if I’ve misrepresented your “it’s aimed towards creative people & entrepreneurs and is about getting noticed to become more successful at what you do” book by calling it a “self-help book”.
In an editorial, I can actually express any opinion I want, so long as it’s not defamatory, which of course it wasn’t. In fact, I think I’ve given you a fairly positive review. The whole video is essentially me saying how great your book is and how everyone should buy it, albeit in a tongue-in-cheek way.
You can’t commission a review and then kick up a fuss when the reviewer doesn’t give you the exact review you want. If you made a film and I gave it 3 stars and you think it’s worth 5, well then bad luck. That’s the risk you take when you put your product out there.
Are you going to hold up your end of the bargain by giving me my affiliate tracking code link?
Kind regards,
David M. Green
And strangely enough I have yet to receive a reply.
I’m guessing I’m not going to see any money from this…
So if you enjoyed my video review of “Get Noticed”, please share the link. Post this to your Facebook or Twitter accounts.
If you’d actually like to buy a copy of “Get Noticed”, you can do so here. But keep in mind, as I don’t have an affiliate link, I’m not receiving any commission. So if you would be so kind as to use the “donate” button on the left hand side of my website to shoot me over $7.50, I would be very confused.
Also, I have not read this book.
Kind regards,
David M. Green
Hey, made a good blog entry at least.
Horah! It’s episode 5 of Sam Mac’s “Lights, Camera, Maction!” guest starring Dr Chris Brown (AKA The Bondi Vet – who turns out to be a pretty good actor), as well as myself and the delightful and clearly gullible Minky Cooper for another escapade into stuff girls like.
This time we have a slumber party… Enjoy!
And once again, cheers to Simon Eastwood behind the camera.
Kind regards,
David M. Green
Gotta love that robe.
That ought to get your mouth watering for my new TV game show. It’s our opening sketch with special guest, former host of Sale of the Century, TV’s Glenn Ridge! Also, you might want to grab a napkin.
Yes! I can now officially announce 31 Questions (finally) will be taping its special second pilot on the evening of Wednesday June 29, 2011. This show will hopefully become episode 1 of our 13-episode first season.
If you’ll be in the Melbourne area and are interested in joining our studio audience, you can get the details and RSVP to the event on Facebook. If you’re not on Facebook, what the hell are you doing?
