David M. Green: Purveyor of fine humour

Category: video

  • 2013 A.D(MG)

    It’s the end of another year this year. And what an end of a year it’s been. Also, the rest of the year was eventful.

    I started 2013 with no regular work and by March I’d run out of money. Well, I say “run out of money”, but I mean it in the first world sense. I got down to my last $9 in the bank, but I still had a car and other things of tangible value, etc. But it was still pretty stressful.

    At one point, I applied for a job as a school crossing guard with the Boroondara Council. It was basically this scene from the 1985 motion picture “Lost in America” starring Albert Brooks:

    I wasn’t successful.

    But I did do this for $150:

    Salvation came with the AFL Season and my return to Crocmedia to panel their fabulous “AFL Live” football commentary to 100 radio stations around Australia. Best radio job I’ve had.

    [Sports writing mode begins]

    The most memorable moment was the Adelaide v. North Melbourne game, Round 9 at Etihad Stadium. The Kangaroos had lead for the entire game, only to have the Crows kick 5 unanswered goals in the final quarter, culminating in an Adelaide goal with only 15 seconds left to give my home town a miracle 1-point victory. It was a fairy tale ending. I’ve never heard Rex Hunt call anything as intense as that.

    You can listen to the highlights package I edited during the game here.

    I don’t leap out of that panel operator’s chair onto my feet very often, but that was one of those moments.

    [Sports writing mode ends]

    After the AFL season finished, I started some weekend panelling at 1116SEN, using the ole MTR studios in Richmond. So finally, that move from Coburg to Hawthorn to be closer to work (2 days before MTR shut down) has actually paid off. Only took 18 months.

    And actually, since I moved in July from the eastern side of Hawthorn to the western side, a stone’s throw from Richmond, I’m close enough to WALK to work in about 15 minutes. The route takes me down Bendigo Street past the old GTV Channel 9 studios, now luxury apartments. To use my favourite cliched broadcasting expression, it’s “absolutely sensational”.

    Please enjoy this guided tour of my new place:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8T2pT_bdvAU

    It’s much better than the last apartment. Cheaper. More space. Laundry taps and an exhaust fan in the bathroom (as mentioned). And the insulation is excellent. That 40 degree day in Melbourne the other week? Barely noticed it. Place doesn’t even have air conditioning. The insulation alone is just so effective.

    2013 has been another year of media delights. In addition to 20 throw-away episodes of my “need an excuse to upload something” vlog series “Life of DMG” (as seen above), I also made a few videos with TV’s Shane Crawford for his website. I was basically Richter to his O’Brien. Shaffer to his Letterman. And to a lesser extent, robot skeleton to his Ferguson. Though I can’t seem to find those videos online any more, you can see part of one in my most recent showreel, where I took one for the team:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F8Y9CBJ_BZs

    31 Questions – The TV game show all the kids are listening about – returned for its second season. We shot 9 episodes, 7 of which were broadcast-able. They aired on community TV stations in Melbourne, Sydney, Brisbane, Perth and New Zealand. And will soon air in Adelaide after they finish repeating the first season.

    Season 2 was a step up in many respects. Better graphics, better editing, a flashier scoreboard, more defined characters and some minor touches here and there. Although it wasn’t quite the step up in lighting and audio that we had hoped.

    There are always challenges and setbacks when you’re making a television show. We had to make do with reduced studio time, simultaneously throughout the production my parents back in Adelaide were splitting up after 29 years of marriage, and worst of all I had a really bad haircut 2 weeks before we started taping.

    But we had some good crowds towards the end and the laughs were there. And what our crew managed to do with those limited resources was quite impressive. Not bad for $4,000?

    This is my favourite episode. It was the Season 2 premier, but it was actually the last episode we shot:

    And in case you missed the memos, 31 Questions is indeed coming back for a third season. We raised $3,262 with our recent crowdfunding campaign and we’re back in the fabulous RMIT University televisual studio from late February.

    This will be the big one. So stay posted if you want to come join the studio audience or BE ON THE SHOW.

    Back in Adelaide, after talking about it for years, my folks have finally sold the family home at Seacliff. I remember the day we moved in: 17 March 1992, just before my 5th birthday.

    It’s a great house. The big walls all around the outside got me quite used to privacy. Everywhere else I’ve lived has seemed quite exposed by comparison. And aside from 9 months in 2000, when the second storey appeared, I lived there 18 years until I left for Melbourne in 2010.

    It was still nice to return to my home town and stay in my old bedroom. But I don’t have that any more. And the SA jaunts haven’t quite been the same. This year in particular, going back to visit Adelaide has felt less and less like visiting home and more like seeing a jigsaw puzzle with pieces gradually being removed and replaced.

    Don’t get me wrong, I love Adelaide and there’s some exciting things going on at the moment. I’ve had many a conversation about local infrastructure projects with anyone who will listen. But it’s not where I want to be right now.

    Ahh I’ll miss that house… But it will live on in so many video projects, like this one:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4oQakmn_cAw

    That reminds me, we really should get around to editing those 3 other Too Easy episodes…

    So that’s about it for 2013. Well I did some other things. I went to Sydney for a bit. Bought a bookcase. Hosted a documentary series about webseries. Had a really nice sandwich, etc.

    But my big news for the new year is I’ll be a writer on the third season of “Shaun Micallef’s Mad As Hell” starting February 2014! Coincidentally, my first day writing is on the 13th, which is the four year anniversary of my move to Melbourne.

    How about that?

    Best move ever.

    Hope you’ve had a good year yourself and things are looking even better for 2014. I’ll see you on the other side.

    You can buy me a coffee.

    Kind regards,
    David M. Green
    No, I’m serious. Small cappuccino with one, please.

  • Merry Christmas from 31 Questions! (select video MOST relevant to you)

    Merry Christmas from me and the team from 31 Questions: The TV game show of that name. Please view the appropriate Christmas message:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a3v23l8BkG0

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V72Nkx6Tq94

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1-dQCGkMsTU

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=371W84T_tYA

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uuoz0oKX-nQ

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I6VdemGVKoI

    If you live somewhere other than Melbourne, Adelaide, Brisbane, Perth, Sydney or New Zealand, just try to imagine your favourite message without any geographic references.

    Happy holidays,
    David M. Green

  • I’M making 31 Questions Season 3… are YOU?

    Yes. Yes! YEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSS!

    We’re back in the crowdfundorium that is Indiegogo to raise some legal tender for the production of our third and most likely final season of 31 Questions – coming 2014 to your local community TV station and/or Internet.

    If this is your first visit to my website and you’ve never heard of 31 Questions, you’re a dull boy, Billy.

    This is what it’s all about:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EaUYb1qKVL8

    If you like what you see and would like to help MAKE the TV game show everyone’s listening about, go to our campaign page on Indiegogo and make a contribution. Like last time, there’s also some fabulous merchandise on offer, including badges.

    Did I mention we got badges?

    I’ve never seen my semen under a microscope, but I imagine it looks something like that.

    We also have NEW MUGS! They’re like the badges, but with a larger concavity at the rear, perfect for holding liquids, if you know what I mean:

    Like last time, we’re also keeping track of our crowdfunder locations on this planet of ours (to the nearest suburb). 3 days in and we’ve already had donations from FOUR different countries! And New Zealand isn’t even one of them!

    Check out our fabulous Season 3 Crowdfunder Map as it gradually becomes infected with more and more little blue markers:


    View 31 Questions Season 3 Crowdfunders in a larger map

    As of writing this blog entry, we’ve already raised an amazing $570! The goal this time is $5,000, so we’re already more than 10% of the way there.

    Last season, we managed to raise $1,846 and that was fantastic, but it still left a large gap between that figure and the actual cost of making season 2. And this time we’re hoping to invest in a totally new set and pay some of the key crew members.

    Ahh community television. It’s a low price to pay for total creative freedom.

    Big thank you to all our contributors so far. I’ll post the full list of names at the end of the campaign after December 14, and of course every donor will get a special thanks in the show’s credits.

    And merchandise is, if not in, then on the way to being in, the mail.

    Kind regards,
    David M. Green
    Past tense of Indiegogo? Indiewentwent.

  • 31 Questions S2E06 & Sydney Funtimes

    31 Questions S2E06 aired on C31 Melbourne & Geelong on the 31st day of August. And there is it on glorious YouTube.

    I spent 4 days in Sydney last week. It was the first time in seven years I’d been somewhere that wasn’t Melbourne or Adelaide. And it was fantastic.

    I stayed in the seaside suburb of Sans Souci on the shores of Botany Bay (to my knowledge, the only bay named after a spaceship from Star Trek) with the lovely Barb Badham:

    She’s mother to my good friend and mentor Van Badham. Here’s a photo of her aged 14, which I discovered in a drawer that wasn’t locked in any serious kind of way:

    I forgot that I actually like Sydney. Last time I was there it was for New Year’s Eve 2006 when my Grandma treated the family to watch the fireworks on Sydney Harbour. An unforgettable experience. Back then, I returned to Adelaide via Melbourne. On that trip, I had a much better time in Sydney than Melbourne. To quote my 19-year-old self from my own diary:

    7 January 2007
    “I think I prefer Sydney to Melbourne. Watching this promotional video in the Rialto Tower really gave me the impression Melbourne is an arrogant city. It’s really just a bigger, more disorganised Adelaide.”

    It probably didn’t help I was travelling with my good friend John Timoney and by the time we got to Melbourne, we were well and truly sick of each other. While I’ve got my diaries out, here’s how I felt about Melbourne when I was there again 18 months later:

    12 July 2008
    “Melbourne is great. I can see myself living here more than I could last time.”

    Quite a turn around! And since then, the only news I ever hear about Sydney is to do with traffic congestion, high cost of living and racist electorates in the western suburbs. But I always have a great time when I’m there (I don’t drive and I stay away from the western suburbs).

    Highlights of this Sydney trip include meeting Mark Humphries from ABC2’s “The Roast” at Pizza Hut. We talked comedy and TV and such for 5 hours straight. Didn’t even take a photo with him. But he’s pretty good in this:

    I also caught the train to the Petersham TAFE to be interviewed by Sean Campbell for his “The Sean Campbell Show” on XRLENT Radio. Good guy. We talked about 31 Questions, TVS, RMITV, radio and Adelaide. Here’s the video of our chat:

    On Thursday, after one and a half cancellations, I finally caught up with my old radio pal Matty B at the Queen Victoria Building (or MB at the QVB). Hadn’t seen him in 3 years. Again no photo, but we did do this once:

    [display_podcast]

    And now for the strangest experience of my trip…

    On Thursday night, to coincide with the broadcast of S2E04 on TVS, I journeyed to Ultimo (a couple of streets back from the headquarters of the Australian Broadcasting Corporation), home to the infamous “Ultimo Bachelor Pad” – the self proclaimed (and probably rightly so) biggest 31 Questions fans in, if not Sydney, then the world.

    Now, they are some REAL fans…

    To illustrate:

    Dear God. We must be doing something right with 31 Questions?

    Thanks again to Mike, James, Zoe, Nathan, Mel and (via Skype from Europe) Daniel for a magnificent dinner and cake, as well as their ridiculous amount of support they continue to give to me and the rest of the 31 Questions team. Fans in other cities, you’ve got your work cut out for you if you plan on topping that.

    I’m now safely back in Melbourne. And it’s back to the hyper-reality that is my life.

    Kind regards,
    David M. Green
    PS. 31 Questions debuts on Face Television New Zealand this Thursday 9.30PM.

  • 31 Questions with John Blackman and Dicky Knee! (and Rohan from Big Brother?)

    Here’s the YouTube link to S2E05 of 31 Questions, which aired on C31 Melbourne & Geelong 8.30PM last Saturday. This is the one with special guests John Blackman and Dicky Knee (a)LIVE in the studio. Both an absolute pleasure to work with.

    It was a tight battle between this week’s contestants, Dani and Rohan (AKA the guy from Big Brother). One of them even won.

    And man, it was pretty surreal doing schtick with Dicky Knee. I used to love “Hey Hey, It’s Saturday” when I was growing up back in the 90s, before the Internet. What a vastly different media landscape we live in now.

    Speaking of which…

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8CjhQNSros0

    And you can now also follow the REAL Sophie Loughran on Twitter: @SophieMLoughran

    Only 2 episodes to go!

    Kind regards,
    David M. Green
    We just realised Anthony, Sophie and I ALL have the middle initial of “M”. What are the odds?