• Mr David M. Green BBSc (Psyc)

    Greetings to you!

    It’s my great pleasure to inform you that I, David M. Green, am now a university graduate! I graduated from Flinders University, South Australia with a Degree of Bachelor of Behavioural Science (Psychology). So now I can stop just putting “BS” at the end of my name (for obvious reasons), and add the other “B” and the little “c”… and the “(Psyc)” bit too, which to me seems like overkill anyway… but hey, what do I know?

    For proof of my graduation, see the photo below of me in my academic dress (that’s me on the right):

    Getting to wear a mortarboard was one of the main reasons I chose to go to university in the first place; Mortarboard, student media, avoiding getting a job and something about a degree (in that order). I received many a jest at my hood, which was coloured pink, allegedly to represent the field of psychology… I guess it makes sense, something like 85% of the students in the course were female… oh yeah, add that to the list of reasons why I went to uni!

    Now, I don’t imagine I’ll be going back to university any time soon, so instead of actually purchasing my ceremonial academic clothes, I hired them from the university for a whopping $50! And I had to give it all back on the same day! Outrageous! I at least wanted to get some of my graduate friends together and head on down to the unemployment office to rattle some cages, but they all returned theirs straight away. So instead, I decided I’d get the most out of my hire clothes by going home and hanging around the house for a while, before taking the clothes back in the evening… (my graduation was at 11am and the clothes didn’t have to be returned until 7pm… hehe!) Hey I paid for them didn’t I?

    So as you can see in the photos below, firstly I took the gown off (after lunch of course) and relaxed for a while with a little wholesome daytime television:

    Then, as it was such a nice sunny Adelaide day, I decided to get in a bit of exercise:

    But then I forgot I was supposed to mow the lawn:

    So I quickly gave the lawn a once-over and jammed on back to Flinders University to return my grass-stained gown with 20 minutes to spare, and with the university staff none the wiser… Of course if any of them are reading this blog entry they’d now know the whole story… but who cares? I’ve already graduated! Hahaha!

    Academically yours,
    David M. Green BBSc (Psyc)
    (Mortarboard = smart. Mortarboard that’s too small = forehead like a Klingon)

  • Smiddy Calls a Pizza Place

    Matthew “Smiddy” Smith is a character regular browsers of this website would be familiar with from his numerous “Smiddy’s Driving Tips” segments. BUT… rumour has it he’s put out a range of audio tapes containing 16 helpful money-saving phrases that’ll help you in your pursuit of a life of luxury… For only $978.95 you’ll have the potential to earn (scam) yourself millions of dollars! So for the career investor (criminal) it’s no doubt a wise choice.

    As a brief demonstration of Smiddy’s latest product (scam), I put Smiddy’s 16 phrases to good use and called a local pizza place to try to get some money out of them. A visualisation of the call can be viewed below…

  • A Tribute to The Late Charlton Heston

    Click on the image below to hear a moving tribute to The Late Charlton Heston…

    Charlton Heston
    1924-2008

  • Fruitcup Has Arrived!

    Finally! “Fruitcup,” the Internet Sitcom that’s taking a small section of the Internet Sitcom demographic by storm is available for YOU to view right here! And keep checking www.fruitcup.org – more info coming soon…

    Fruitcup Episode 1: Pilot

    Fruitcup Episode 2: Date (Part 1 of 2)

    Fruitcup Episode 2: Date (Part 2 of 2)

  • Can’t Get Enough Bas Rutten?

    Hey to all you Bas Rutten fans out there! Bas Rutten has made a number of “appearances” on my various radio shows, so I thought just for you, the die hard fans (of Bas Rutten, not the 1988 Bruce Willis film, obviously…), I’d compile a “Best of Bas Rutten” blog entry! Listen back to his past appearances in various forms by clicking the links below…

    Rejected Radio Shows: ‘Bas Rutten Live’ 

    Imset Liver Protection

    Bas Rutten defends his wife’s honour

    Cooking with Bas Rutten on ‘Tonight Live with Smiddy’

    Bas Rutten’s School of Dating

    Bas kicks ass on Tim’s Family Feud

    Bas Rutten calls an adult massage parlour

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OetgbVrm8yw

    Cooking with Bas Rutten

    Oh yeah, one last thing… Apparently my comic radio references to Bas Rutten have proven so popular on the Internet, a fellow fan from Canada has made a public Bas Rutten soundboard, which is available here:

    http://www.realmofdarkness.net/sounds/misc/basrutten-soundboard.htm.

    How freaking unbelievable is that!?! This is NOT the soundboard that I used to make the Bas Rutten calls. Before I made the prank calls above for my radio show Pow-Wow no Bas Rutten soundboard existed, but this one features many of the same clips I used, plus more. What do you know? My slight influence on the World!

    Kind regards,
    David M. Green
    Avid Bas Rutten Fan