If you missed my piece (opinion piece, I mean. Not a firearm.) in mX last week, here it is in fabulous scanned electro-newsprint:
And if that’s not working for ya, here’s the text version:
For What It’s Worth
David M. Green on Twitter Etiquette
I followed Phil Collins on Twitter. You’d think of all people, the guy who sang “Follow You Follow Me” would follow back. He didn’t.
But he’s a big star – even if he hasn’t had a hit in 15 years. He can’t possibly follow back all his Twitter fans. So what’s your excuse for not following back? Are YOU famous?
I don’t think so.
So what is proper Twitter etiquette, or “Twittiquette”?
The ultimate insult in 2013 is to ignore someone online. It’s one thing to simply ignore someone you don’t know or with whom you have no common interests. We do this to millions of people by default.
But unless you’re a celebrity, you’re in a genuine category of jerk if someone you’ve met in your travels follows you on Twitter, and you don’t follow back.
It’s the technological equivalent of sticking out your hand for a high five, only to be left hanging. You’d have to truly despise someone – and want them to know it – to do that. You never leave a guy hanging.
A Twitter following is seen by many as a symbol of power. More followers means more influence. And more chance someone will want to give you a briefcase full of money for no reason. The history of the Internet is filled with stories like that, right?
But it’s not enough simply to have a pile of followers. The assumption seems to be: “I’ll only be seen as powerful and interesting if I have lots of followers AND I’m not following many people”. In other words, you need an impressive “power ratio”.
There are many ways to get that power ratio. You can do what a few politicians have done and just buy some Twitter followers, which is great if you like robots. You can do a Miley Cyrus and twerk your way to a pile of followers with a controversial public stunt. You could even try actually working hard in the real world for a number of years to establish yourself as an influential figure in your chosen field… Na.
The fastest and cheapest way to get Twitter followers is to follow a bunch of people, then unfollow the ones who didn’t follow back. And then unfollow the ones who DID follow back. Presto! Power ratio.
Although, there is a slight problem with that. If you’re actively ignoring people who follow you because you think it’ll enhance your power ratio, you’re ultimately just making enemies. I don’t know about you, but I feel less inclined to like someone if I know they’re not interested in me. Screw the power games.
The amazing thing is; being nice on Twitter is so easy. It’s the easiest way to be nice in the history of social interaction. Take the high road. Keep your followers. Keep following back. That’s all you’ve got to do. Even if you hate their guts.
Of course, if you’re followed by a business that treats Twitter like a spam-delivery system, you’re under no obligation to follow back. And life is too short for trolls, bots and troll-bots (they’re the worst).
But if you want to be the nicest person in the online world, follow back, like a status and give a retweet now and then. People will love you for life. Or at least until you stop following them.
—
And a big welcome to my 5 new Twitter followers!
I may have acquired more had mX been able to print underscores properly.
Na, they’re okay.
Kind regards,
David M. Green
@David_M_Green
