David M. Green: Purveyor of fine humour

Tag: parody

  • Relax Frankie… it’s 31 Questions!

    Ahh… satire.

    Kind regards,
    David M. Green

    PS. Apologies to my sister Hannah, who thought this was real and told all her friends that her brother is on the cover of upcoming edition of Frankie Magazine.

  • 31 Questions Ep #12: Penultimayhem!

    MMMMYYYYEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSS!

    It’s the second to last episode of season 1 of 31 Questions! And in my opinion, this episode is the best one.

    It features my favourite segment from the series: “Showboating” – where contestants David & Erin have to name the boat. Special thanks to Maritime Union of Australia President Paddy Crumlin (actually his name).

    And a welcome to our new fans in Perth and Adelaide after this week’s debut in those two cities.

    I’ve been whoring myself in the Adelaide media this week.

    Here’s me on Radio Adelaide 101.5FM’s “Radionotes” with John Murch.

    And then I had a chat with Peter Godfrey on FiveAA.

    I also made my first appearance in The Adelaide Advertiser since my 1987 birth notice:

    Fantastic media coverage for a community TV show with no PR budget. If I do say so myself, because I sure as hell am not paying anyone else to.

    Big thanks to the Adelaide Confidential section of The Advertiser!

    We’re even willing to overlook the fact they forgot to mention the NAME OF THE SHOW…

    But to their credit, all the other facts are spot on.

    I’ve just seen the rough cut of our season finale, which goes to air tomorrow, Saturday 10PM on Channel 31 Melbourne & Geelong.

    First day of spring. Last night of 31 Questions.

    I’m sad it’s coming to an end. Of course, it’s not the complete end. It’s only just beginning on TV in the other cities, and still yet to debut in others still.

    There was so much we wanted to get into the last show. I’ve made sure we didn’t cut me thanking on screen all of the important people who made 31 Questions possible.

    Although it may be tedious for you the viewer to watch me list a bunch of names of people you’ve never heard of, if it weren’t for them, you wouldn’t be watching me tediously listing those names on TV… so think about that.

    And if you liked our Facebook Page before Tuesday, get your freeze-framing finger ready because your name’s being broadcast!

    I predict you’re going to love it.

    Kind regards,
    David M. Green
    Televisionman.

  • 31 Questions Ep #11: The Eleventh Episode.

    That’s right!

    It’s fabulous Episode #11 of the TV game show that makes all the other TV game shows look like TV game shows… 31 Questions! Featuring a very special appearance from 31 Questions writer Gerard Kotlowy (although, he was a little flat).

    Ep #11 also features the gag round “Grammar Nazi” where contestants have to correct the grammar on poorly written signage. Are YOU a Grammar Nazi? Or were you just following orders…

    I reckon this episode is my favourite so far.

    As our final episode is fast approaching, as a special thank you to all our fans and supporters, we’re going to put EVERY FAN’S NAME ON TV!

    “But how will you know who the fans are, fools at 31 Questions?”

    Good question. Have ten points. Now, the best method of sourcing our fans’ names we can think of is just taking them from our FACEBOOK FAN PAGE. So head on over there and if you click “like” before 28 August 2012, you’ll get to see your name on TV in Ep #13, which airs on Channel 31 Melbourne & Geelong on 1 September!

    Now of course, the unfortunate bi-product of this venture, “stunt” if you will, is a rapid increase in Facebook fans. And well… we’re just going to have to accept that.

    In other news, for the first time ever you’ll be able to watch us in TWO STATES this evening!

    Regular viewers in Melbourne and Geelong can catch Ep #12 tonight at 10PM on Channel 31.

    Meanwhile, 3000km away in Western Australia, Perth fans can get their first taste of 31 Questions Ep #1 on West TV (Digital 44) at 11.30PM local time.

    If you’re in the great state of South Australia, 31 Questions starts on 44 Adelaide Tuesday 28 August with Ep #1 airing at 10.30PM local time. And listen out for me on some Adelaide radio stations next week plugging the show (follow 31 Questions on Twitter for reminders).

    Sydney & Brisbane, sit tight. I’ll get back to you as soon as I know the time slots and start dates.

    And we just got word this week that Triangle Television in Auckland has approved 31 Questions too! Of course, had New Zealand joined the Federation in 1901 with the rest of the colonies, this would be far less impressive and international. More info on dates and times soon.

    Kind regards,
    David M. Green
    I’m working my butt off here!

  • 31 Questions Ep #10: Beautiful People’s Edition!

    MMMMMmmmmYYYYYEEEEESSSSS!

    It’s the 10th episode of 31 Questions for your YouTube viewing pleasure. This one features a cameo appearance from host of Deal or No Deal Australia, TV’s Andrew O’Keefe.

    And thanks to the marvelous editing of Anthony McCormack, you’ll hardly even notice the terrible audio issues we had while shooting that sketch, and which we didn’t notice until we got to the editing room.

    Let this be a free lesson for the aspiring television-maker: It’s not enough to just monitor the audio levels on the camera’s little viewing screen. You have to actually be listening with HEADPHONES. Otherwise you won’t pick up weird clicky noises caused be faulty XLR cables and be forced to dub scenes with audio from different takes.

    But hey, that’s the fun of TV…

    Thanks again to AO’K for being such a good sport and allowing us to blow him up for the entertainment of others.

    We’ve had quite a bit of feedback from viewers recently, which is FANTASTIC!

    Here’s a fine post about us from Bother’s Bar on the other side of the planet, where he describes me as “Tim Vine-esque”. I’ll certainly take that!

    Fun fact: During my 2010 interview with Tim Vine, we jointly came up with the “Typo Magazine’s Man of the Ear” gag, which I later used in Ep #6 of 31 Questions.

    That’s one of my favourite lines. I originally came up with “Typo Magazine’s Man of the Beer”. But Tim Vine suggested “Ear”. A superior punchline. Or punch “word”, really. In my opinion, it should be a contender for “World’s most perfect joke”. Just six words long, but it’s all it needs to be.

    Of course regardless of its comic perfection, when I delivered that line in Ep #6 the joke bombed.

    Makes ME laugh…

    We also had a YouTube comment on Ep #10 from a guy called “jedimerchants”. It’s quite bizarre. This video response pretty much sums it up:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kkEDlQNoiaY

    Thank you once again beautiful contestants!

    Ep #11 arrives on your television screen (assuming you live in Melbourne or Geelong AND don’t live in an apartment building that automatically blocks out Channel 31… found that one out the hard way last weekend…) tomorrow (Saturday) evening 10PM on Digital 44.

    See you then (from the TV).

    Kind regards,
    David M. Green
    I’m not crazy.

  • 31 Questions Ep #06

    31 Questions episode #6 has been put out to pasture on YouTube, where it shall remain until the end of time or until the YouTube supercomputer collapses in on itself under the pressure of excessive cat videos.

    In other news, we’ve now been approved by WestTV Perth, TVS Sydney, 31 Digital Brisbane AND 44 Adelaide to be re-broadcast on their local stations!

    So if YouTube’s not your thing and you live in one of those metropolitan areas, stay tuned for your chance to watch 31 Questions from the comfort of your armchair, just like us fancy folks in Melbourne & Geelong.

    Kind regards,
    David M. Green
    31 Questions: Proudly brought to you by NO SPONSOR.