Ahoy! I haven’t written a poem in about 10 years, but I was recently inspired by certain real life events to pen this one. Did somebody say, “Oh that DMG, he just hit the Australian media industry zeitgeist right in the sweet spot?”
No?
Well, here it is anyway…
“The Thrifty Browser”
By David M. Green
I click on links in interestin’ tweets
from The Australian & Herald Sun.
But the journey ends when I reach the paywall.
Money exchanged equals none.
The Internet should be free for all.
Online ads are bad enough.
When I’m bombarded with pesky pop-ups,
I vow never to buy any of that stuff.
Have you heard the new single from blah blah blah?
I don’t care if pop music stays alive.
There’s songs from the ‘80s I haven’t discovered yet.
The last CD I bought was in 2005.
And why wait a week between episodes
When you can just download them all in one go?
I’m more familiar with the New York guide now.
Just get it from HBO.
There’s no gift you can buy me
That I can’t just get for free.
Although it can get a little tedious
Browsing torrents, isoHunt and GumTree.
I like the idea of escaping the PR
That drives the media these days.
The web is my sanctuary, my fortress of solitude,
Filled with excessive cat video replays.
Working in media would be my dream come true.
Legitimate careers are uninspiring.
But it’s pretty difficult to get a job at the moment.
How come nobody’s hiring?
Kind regards,
David M. Green
Enough said.