David M. Green: Purveyor of fine humour

Tag: signs

  • The idiots. They walk among us…

    People are idiots. Evidence as follows:

    Fine coffee. Appalling punctuation.

    Every week I see menus with shocking spelling. Now would be the time your usual bad-grammar-blogger would mock the “Chinglish” found at Asian restaurants, but hey, how about a little class?

    Let’s make fun of Italians!

    Spot the mistakes:

    Assuming you ignore the capital letters, did you spot all of these:

    These are printed menus, by the way… What a joke!

    I was at a Williamstown ice-creamery recently. Take a gander at their Licorice Licks:

    It’s the flavour that demands followers!

    Now for some numerical idiocy:

    That 8 looks a little top-heavy…

    And finally, ha-ha-have a look at this sign:

    Wait a minute… let’s have a closer look…

    Yes, who could forget one of Melbourne’s favourite beach-side suburbs… Bondi.

    WHAA!?!

    Unless by “made” they mean “post-produced”, I’m pretty sure Bondi Vet is made in Sydney.

    Maybe they mean the SIGN was made in Melbourne?

    People, aye? No freaking idea.

    Kind regards,
    David M. Green
    Sure, everyone makes mistakes, but JESUS!

  • I want candy… wait, what?

    On a recent peruse through the supermarket aisles, searching to satisfy my notorious sweet tooth, I came across a small spelling discrepancy. Allow me to illustrate…

    Exhibit A – Foodland, Brighton, SA

    Exhibit E – Woolworths, Coburg, Vic.

    I am confused. To be honest, I wasn’t completely sure which version was correct.

    But to my surprise, believe it or not, according to dictionary.com, BOTH spellings are acceptable:

    “Confectionery”
    noun, plural -er·ies
    1. confections or sweetmeats collectively.
    2. the work or business of a confectioner.
    3. a confectioner’s shop.

    “Confectionary”
    noun, plural -ar·ies
    1. a candy; sweetmeat.
    2. a place where confections are kept or made.
    3. confectionery.
    adjective
    4. pertaining to or of the nature of confections or their production.

    Go figure.

    Kind regards,
    David M. Green
    For the record, I purchased Fruchocs at Foodland and a MilkyBar at Woolworths. HmmmMMMMmmmm… Ohhhh yeeeessss…