Greetings from my isolation tank (ie. my bedroom… what? Don’t YOU sleep in a tank?),
This video pretty much speaks for itself…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7TRE-oQy8Qk
Quite. For the last week and a bit (I honestly can’t remember exactly when it started), I have been quite sick. It’s very “flu-like.” I know what you’re all thinking, because I have a psychology degree and therefore, I can read minds. And you’re all very disturbed… But also, you’re thinking “Is it THE Swine Flu?” Well, the thought crossed my mind too, so my doctor, who also happens to be my Mother, administered a test that involved jamming a swab up my nose. She was supposed to insert it a ridiculous 5cm or something like that. It went in maybe half of that and I said “Hey, that’s as far as it’s going. You’re poking my brain!” Thankfully, the test came back negative for the Swine Flu. But regular flu is just as bad.
I seem to be on the “recovery” end now. To quote Rodney Dangerfield: “Buy a hat like that you get a free bowl of soup.” And also: “I tell ya I’m alright now but last week I was in rough shape, you know?” Yes. I do know. I was in VERY ROUGH shape. I was coughing up all kinds of things, including the biggest chunk of phlegm that’s ever originated in my sinus. So large in fact I took a photo of it. After much consideration, I have decided to share the photo with the world. After all, what’s the Internet for? Now, I won’t FORCE the gruesome image onto you, so if you would LIKE to see it, you can view the genuine David M. Green limited edition sputum RIGHT HERE. Note, interestingly, it appears to be in the shape of Australia. I guess I am a patriot, huh?
Kind regards,
David M. Green
*Cough* *Cough*
