I guess I did cast a shadow at this afternoon’s Raw Comedy heat at Melbourne’s fabulous Northcote Social Club, but this literal shadow wasn’t what the judges were looking for.

I was on first, which is always a tough spot. The audience wasn’t really warmed up. And no one was drunk yet. However, I’m not sure whether alcohol would have increased the crowd’s appreciation for my cerebral blend of humour.

I am not a particularly good “stand-up” comedian.

I think a lot of my gags would work better if written on a desk calendar…

I don’t do jokes about where I’m from (who cares?). I don’t play to the room. I don’t swear in my routine. And David M. Green doesn’t go blue, unless it’s “clever”, and even then, I personally find using the scientific words for things funnier than their crude slang equivalents. This doesn’t seem to be a shared love.

Maybe if I did the opposite of what I just stated above, I’d get more laughs. But, what would be the point?

I have really high standards, both for my own material, and that of other comedians. So generally I find myself sitting quietly in the audience hearing other comedians play on some old gender/racial/locational stereotypes, thinking, “this has been done”.

It’s quite heart-breaking. But of course, what do you expect? People are idiots, after all.

So why do I keep doing this?

Because comedy is networking. Because people don’t take you seriously as a comedian unless you do stand-up. To show people I can write and perform, fundamental skills that apply to other comedy formats, eg. television, radio, etc.

And also, so stuff like this happens:

Triple J’s Dave Callan came up to me after the show and took me up on my offer of free autographed headshots!

I guess the day wasn’t a complete waste of time.

So that’s it for me and Raw Comedy. You can only enter 3 times, which I have now done. Certainly my best appearance was last year, when for some reason, everything just worked:

But if you want to experience a more DMG-friendly comedy format, tune in to “The Magic Show” on SYN 90.7FM from 8pm, Thursday January 27. I’ll be radio-ing with Antonio Cafasso until 6am!  Ten hours of sketches, prank calls, guests, obscure ’80s new wave music and a few other surprises…

Now you’re talkin’!

Kind regards,
David M. Green
Did someone say excessively over-produced IDs?

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