FINALLY! The good people at Roy Morgan Research have knocked on my door and for once it is I, David M. Green… who get to contribute to the official Australian television and radio ratings… And you can bet your sweet ass I’m going WAAAAAAYYYYY out of my way this week to avoid watching and listening to the vacuous, sensationalised, reality, celebrity, commercial-driven CRAP that comprises 90% of the content that infects our screens and speakers!
This week, I’m supporting outstanding comedy, professional journalism and TV and radio programmes that are ACTUALLY entertaining. I’m taking so much satisfaction in putting an ‘x’ under the ABC’s fantastic new comedy series ‘Very Small Business’ and leaving blank boxes under ‘Taken Out,’ ‘Make me a Supermodel,’ ‘Today Tonight,’ ‘A Current Affair,’ ‘Neighbours,’ ‘Dancing with the Stars,’ ‘Crash Investigation Unit’ and all those other appalling programmes clogging our screens that were obviously thought up during someone’s lunch break.
But what’s that you say? Hey David you hypocrite, you worked for SAFM, a notoriously commercial radio station! Well firstly, astute observation and well articulated. And secondly, allow me to explain my philosophy on the issue… Sure, I’ll work for commercial media if they pay me (it’s lots of fun!), BUT… I’ll sure as hell never stop trying to get genuinely funny, innovative, intelligent and downright entertaining ideas past the suits and the censors. Good comedy requires risk taking. Commercial media in Australia doesn’t like to take risks. They like to stick with what’s tried and true, which is why they more often than not just copy a concept that’s a few years old, which the more media savvy have already seen on BBC, HBO, ABC (Australian Broadcasting Corporation) or downloaded themselves. And if a TV or radio station is making crap, there’s no motivation for John Q. Public to put away the pirated DVDs and the .mp3 player. If you don’t take risks and get out in front of the pack, you’ll never do anything outstanding… That’s why in Australia, the ABC doesn’t only make the best comedy, they make the best television! And ‘Very Small Business,’ Wednesday nights 9:30pm on the ABC, is the funniest Australian show on TV at the moment. I cannot recommend it enough.
Now I also realise I’m a 21-year old male, allegedly the most difficult demographic to crack. And I’m certainly no ordinary representative from my demographic (eg. I have a 142 IQ and love obscure ’80s New Wave music). But I don’t mind going on record as saying most commercial TV and radio in Australia is terrible, because I reckon I know how to make it better… Specific criticism is available upon request. Oh yeah, I really miss ‘Get This’ with Tony Martin, Ed Kavalee and Richard Marsland. There hasn’t been a commercial radio show worth listening to since then in my opinion, and my ratings book is certainly going to reflect my qualms.
Kind regards,
David M. Green
Tellin’ it like it is, and desperately wanting to fix it.