I spent all of January in the zero Covid paradise of Adelaide, watching the crazy events in the United States on TV as their infection and death rates skyrocketed, a violent mob of right-wing conspiracy theorists literally stormed the Capitol Building and their political system teetered on the edge of collapse. It was quite horrifying to be honest. All you could do was watch and hope they held it together.

Luckily those brilliant scientists whipped up some vaccines in record time and adults were allowed back into the White House. But I feel it’s only a matter of time before a new variant returns and starts wreaking havoc. A new variant of Trump I mean. Also the virus.

Summer in Adelaide was surreal. People were walking around in the sunshine and in packed supermarkets, or sitting in a crowded theatre like in the before times. No masks. Almost as if the pandemic and the Melbourne lockdowns were just something I dreamt. It was nice though. Even though I was still very sad about losing my brother just before Christmas and my wife was stuck in Stockholm until April after travelling to visit her dying father, it was good to be among friends and family again.

One way I dealt with my grief over Luke was to throw myself into a new season of VHS Revue, my video tape-reviewing webseries. I had written 10 episodes in the latter half of 2020 with the intention that I’d shoot all my pieces to camera in Adelaide. And that’s exactly what I did, with the help of my good friend Alexis Kotlowy.

I basically spent 3 solid weeks in January editing every night into the small hours and by the end of the month I had 10 new episodes, which I released over the first half of the year. There were times when I was editing where it felt like Luke was sitting on the couch next to me, occasionally offering suggestions just like he used to 20 years ago when I made little cartoon animations in Microsoft Power Point.

One joke in particular I reckon came straight from Luke. The animated Pierce Brosnan line-up in this episode:

He would have laughed hard at that one.

I was quite happy with these new episodes. Got some nice comments and about 200 new YouTube subscribers this year. I also launched a Patreon account and acquired some wonderful financial supporters too. With that money I was able to buy a better video camera and some other equipment so the 8 new episodes I’m working on at the moment will all be in high definition (1080p at 50 frames per second).

Yeah, I think I’m done with the degraded VHS look. It’s too much trouble and I wonder if it deters people from clicking on the videos? I’m sure the YouTube algorithms kick non-HD videos to the back of the queue. So look out for those shiny new ones in 2022.

In February I drove back to Melbourne just in time for Lockdown 3. That one was only a few days so compared to the other ones it hardly counts.

Went straight back to panelling radio at SEN. Panelled all the usual stuff: AFL(W), tennis, A-League, horseracing, cricket (BBL and The Ashes) plus a bunch of shows around the network, from Perth to Adelaide to Tasmania to Brisbane and now New Zealand.

Panelling radio is a strange job really, especially when I’m not in the same room as the on-air talent. One of the Big Bash League cricket matches was played in Sydney. The commentators were in Perth, calling the match off a TV screen. And I was pressing the buttons for it at head office in Melbourne, sitting in a studio on my own. There are people I’ve worked with for years, talk to regularly, and have never met. Or even seen their face.

For the second year in a row the AFL Grand Final couldn’t be held at the MCG due to a Covid outbreak, so Optus Oval in Perth staged it. I panelled one of SEN’s four calls, all going to different radio markets. They had two commentary teams in Perth and another two calling off the TV in Melbourne. I upheld tradition and wore a suit. Not the best lighting in those upstairs studios…

Annika was due to fly back to Melbourne from Sweden in late March but Melbourne still hadn’t resumed hotel quarantine for international arrivals, so her flight was changed to Adelaide.

In April I drove back to Adelaide during that brief period where there were no cases anywhere in Australia and all the state borders were open.

I visited her towards the tail end of her two weeks isolated in Peppers Hotel in the city. Gave me a good opportunity to test out the zoom on my new video camera.

https://twitter.com/David_M_Green/status/1382318947190534144?s=20

We drove back to Melbourne via a couple of days in Halls Gap. Beautiful country.

In May I was back writing on Season 13 of Shaun Micallef’s Mad as Hell. Was great to be back in the office again without the masks. Unfortunately that didn’t last long and on May 27 we were back in Lockdown 4.

The studio audience was all set to return as well but the ABC pre-empted the official lockdown and made the call on May 25 – literally just before taping the first episode – that we were going ahead without the audience. Probably the right move.

Lockdown 4 lasted a couple of weeks and was notable for us because we got our rescue cat Rockley. I’ve always been more of a dog person but I think he’s converted me. We love him.

He’s also on Instagram.

So I wrote from home for a couple of weeks before we were allowed back into the office and by episode 6, the studio audience had returned. It was so great to hear the sound of laughter again. I’d forgotten what it sounded like. But alas, it was short lived as the 12-day Lockdown 5 began July 15.

We were really jerked around this season. It was annoying for sure, but I understand the reasoning. The “let it rip” alternative would have been far worse.

Couple more weeks writing from home before the office opened up just in time for my last 2 writing days before closing again for Lockdown 6. That was the big one. And things didn’t open up again until November when 80 per cent of Victorians were double vaccinated.

Made a couple of cameos this year in between lockdowns, with various face coverings.

I was relieved when I finally got my Pfizer vaccines. Would have been nice to get them a bit earlier and maybe avoid some of those lockdowns but I think Scott Morrison had a photoshoot with a bird feeder or some time sensitive rorting to do or something. Understandable.

So it feels like – in Melbourne anyway – we spent about as much time stuck indoors this year as we did last year. Consequently I read about 10 books. I think that’s a PB.

The best of them was Van Badham’s excellent “QANON AND ON”. Very well researched, fascinating and deeply disturbing. Reminded me of (my favourite) Eric Schlosser and his style of non-fiction writing. I highly recommend. I read quite a bit of it while queuing up at the drive-through testing clinic outside Chadstone Shopping Centre.

Other achievements include finishing a puzzle my sister Hannah sent me and also finishing GTA San Andreas to 100 per cent. Man that NRG-500 Challenge is a bastard.

Oh yeah and last year’s season of Good Afternoon Adelaide won the Antenna Award for Outstanding Sound (two in a row!). Had the ceremony been scheduled for one week earlier, it would have just snuck in before the lockdown chaos but nope. They rescheduled a couple of times but it just wasn’t happening so they finally decided to do it remotely. Fortunately community television has that capability, what with being a television broadcaster and all.

And in fact due to sustained community pressure, the federal government caved once again and gave Channel 31 and Channel 44 extensions to their broadcast licences. Swish!

I was also a guest on a few live streams. They were good fun. It’s sort of like television except I’m on it.

It was nice the SA border opened up again just in time for Christmas. Of course, it has lead to over 1,000 cases a day in Adelaide but it also meant I could see my family for the holidays. So… roped off swings and roundabouts clogged with cars lining up to get tested.

We’re back in Melbourne to see out the end of the year. The cat was happy to see us after spending 5 days in a cattery. His meow sounds a little different now though.

Something new for 2022, and a decade since I moved out of Coburg, I’ll be moving back as we’ve somehow bought our first house. Looking forward to being north side again. The last few years in Malvern have been a little sterile. Although it could just be because I’m sliding into middle age… Well we’ll see about that.

I get the feeling things are still going to get a bit worse before they get better what with 21,000 cases in New South Wales today. But if we’ve all come this far… well what are ya gonna do?

All the best for you in 2022.

-DMG